There have been films in the past that have left me completely stunned at the ‘fade-to-black’. As the credits rolled, I felt anger, sadness, and elation, and sometimes all of those emotions rolled into one. However, for the first time, a film caused me to exhale audibly from the emotion of the film ending. Then, I began to applaud right there as I watched the screener at home. I couldn’t help it. The movie was that good! That film is the brilliant I’m Not An Actor (Main Actor Nahin Hoon), starring the incredible Nawazuddin Siddiqui and Chitrangada Satarupa.
Written, directed, and produced by Aditya Kripalani, this India–Germany co-production is a nuanced exploration of human relationships, the art of acting, and the connections we make. It is presented in a distinctive and utterly unique manner. Throughout the film, the two leads are seen as they interact through a continuous video call across continents. The result is an intimate, day-long conversation that blurs the boundaries between performance and reality.
The story follows Mouni Roy (Satarupa), a struggling, bitter Mumbai-based actor who is deeply passionate about her art, and Adnan (Siddiqui), a retired banker in Frankfurt struggling with depression, who wants to find his light. An online audition brings them together, leading to a single day of connection that transforms both their lives. Through shifting roles of teacher and student, and contrasting landscapes of Mumbai and Frankfurt, the film explores human fragility, resilience, pain, and the shared language of performance.
As I am writing this, I am still lost in that world. I am finding it difficult to detach and examine it. I don’t want to dissect it because I don’t want to remove myself from the emotional journey. But since I want others to know how amazing this film is, I will share my thoughts.
The scenes shot on location in both Frankfurt and Mumbai are fantastic. They really insert you into the world of these two characters with scenes of her taking him along on her journey in Mumbai, and scenes with him walking and talking around Frankfurt.
You might think that having the two leads not interacting in the same physical space, and only communicating digitally, would take you out of the story. Still, somehow, the director managed to make you forget that. This focus on them, separate yet together, actually enhances the story because it adds to the distance — not literally, but figuratively — of what the two people in this brilliant piece go through in that one day. Presenting their story this way is an absolute masterstroke.
The in-depth exploration of the craft of acting is another remarkable aspect of this film. It makes you appreciate the art of the actor and that it is not just about reading some lines. You begin to understand and really appreciate the true art of acting. I won’t say much more about it because this is the deep crux of the story, and you will want to experience it for yourself.
One of the things that amazed me so much was that there was so much more to it than I expected, but also less, and I mean that as a true compliment. This was a quiet study of people and emotion. Sometimes not a word was spoken, but in the moment, in the shot, you still knew and felt everything.
Above all, it is the outstanding, incredibly moving, and chill-bump-inducing performances that make this film the masterpiece it is.
As with every performance, Nawazuddin Siddiqui is absolutely standing ovation worthy. I have always admired his ability to get completely lost inside the characters he portrays. He does that once again, and it is tremendous. It is a pared-back performance, but that makes it even better, because you feel his struggle and sense his sadness. When his desire for life breaks through and his healing begins, his entire being transforms. An actor of his caliber playing an actor who is learning to act is awe-inducing. In his audition scene, Nawazuddin’s real talent shines through in his performance as a reel actor playing the scene in the audition, if that makes sense. I sat there, stunned, and had to pause to bring myself out of his performance. I don’t know how he does that, but he truly is one of the finest ACTORS I have ever had the pleasure of watching. I could go on with my rave, but this performance is one you must experience to see what I am trying to convey.
Now, coming to Chitrangada Satarupa, she is an absolute revelation—one of the best performances I have EVER seen on screen. In the film, she discusses Tabu’s performance in Chandni Bar and how brilliant it was, particularly in the moments where she acted solely with her eyes. Ms. Satarupa, you were the Tabu in this film. Brilliance personified. There were numerous scenes of Mouni, acting scenes for Adnan, on a park bench, just on a balcony, and then the one for the audition, which were incredible. Every moment, she was completely in the role, transforming herself in so many ways; she had to play and embody every emotion, and that completely blew me away with her talent. Then you literally felt her dissatisfaction, her anger, her pain with her life, running throughout her scenes when she was not ‘acting’. It is a BRAVA-worthy performance. If she is this good so early in her career, she will undoubtedly be one of the greatest ever seen. And I am not exaggerating or overplaying my praise — standing ovation with thunderous cheers.
It seems a simple concept, a simple tale, but in actuality, I’m Not An Actor is deep. It is dark, and it does not go where you think it is heading. As I said in the beginning, I actually exhaled when it faded to black, and that has never happened to me before. This must be seen. It must be awarded. It must be rhapsodized and be met with resounding applause every time it is played. I could go on, but I think you get my point.
I had the privilege to speak with the director, Aditya Kripalani, and actors Nawazuddin Siddiqui and Chitrangada Satarupa before seeing the film. I have so many more questions and so much praise to give now that I hope I can talk with each of them again. You can enjoy the full interview here.
In the film, Mouni passionately says, “Kya Film Hai!”, and that is so true for this movie as well. I highly, highly recommend you watch I’m Not An Actor (Main Actor Nahin Hoon). You will find yourself enthralled and moved, also exhaling in wonder as the movie fades to black.
