Shabana Azmi at 74: “What’s thrilling is that the thrill of acting has not gone”

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One of the most esteemed and outstanding actors in cinema, Shabana Azmi has starred in a myriad of genres, showcasing her immense talent. From her debut film Ankur, for which she won a National award, to incredible turns in films like Mrityudand and Fire, to her most recent excellent films What’s Love Got To Do With It? and Rocky Aur Rani Kii Prem Kahaani, and so many more, each performance by Ms. Azmi has been exceptional.

In a very special interview, Shabana Azmi talks with Subhash K Jha about why she still has a passion for acting, whether she would ever step behind the camera and so much more.

74, and still India’s finest actress?
Please, itni taarif ki koi zaroorat nahin. I don’t want to get my head swollen at this stage of life. It is very important to be level-headed about one’s achievements and not get carried away.

Do you see yourself as an achiever?
I  see myself as an actor who has been lucky enough to be at the right place at the right time.

Oh, I’ve heard that one before.
But it’s true! What can I do? I’ve been singularly lucky. Believe me, what I’ve done so far as an actor is like a writer learning the alphabet. Please don’t scream at me. But  I think I’ve just achieved the minimum required of an actor. What’s thrilling is that the thrill of acting has still not gone. I feel the same butterfly in the stomach when I’ve to inhabit another character’s life. I see myself peeping through this window  and wondering, ‘Shall I enter?’  Then I see myself half-opening a  door and telling myself, ‘No, not yet.’ That process of getting into character hasn’t ceased to excite me.

You sound so charged even now?
I think acting by itself is a rewarding profession. It allows you to inhabit other people’s lives. Imagine how much it adds to your experiences.  When for Ankur, the 20-year old Shabana Azmi walked into a village in Andhra Pradesh she had never seen to play Laxmi, she came back with her character Laxmi’s life in addition to her own life. I feel so blessed. Irrespective of what kind of films I do, the thrill of acting continues.

You’re lucky to get roles that do justice to your talent.
 But filmmaking is such a collaborative business. A writer writes it, and a director develops the vision and takes on a team he wants. Actors get credit above the rest because they are in the most visible work. In their hearts, all actors know that others are covering up their weaknesses and highlighting their strengths. Imagine if I give my best shot and the cameraman lights it up badly, or the editor cuts it out! Mar gayee main! Whereas in theatre, an actor is on his own, no matter how much she’s propped by the director and others. No one can save you when you’re on stage. In that sense, theatre is much more of an actor’s medium. If you’ve good actors as co-stars fifty percent of your work is done. Because you’re looking into the eyes of someone who’s telling you the truth, I’m constantly grateful for  the hundreds of people on the set who help me to do my best work possible.

So when are you directing a film?
It’s so easy being an actor. Why should I put my head on the chopper? Mahesh Bhatt had once told me direction is about having a dream and then watching it crumble. Why should I watch my dream crumble? Arrey main kyon maroon?  But seriously, I once in a while flirt with the idea of direction.  I’ve to find a story I  want to direct. And I don’t want the burden of …(in a mock baritone)…this must be a socially responsible film.  That burden  I can’t bear. If I direct it would be a human story that touches me. I’m nervous of forcing myself into making a socially relevant film.


Will you cast yourself?
Impossible! Koi sawaal hi nahin hai.  If I direct, I wouldn’t cast myself.

Whom would you cast?
Someone like Kareena Kapoor or Alia Bhatt. Kareen’s a very, very special girl.  In J.P. Dutta’s LOC, I fell in love with one shot of hers.  She stunned me.

You look radiant even at  74. Why  do older women go for so many cosmetic makeovers  instead of aging gracefully?
It’s a very individual choice.  If there are women who can afford it and they feel good about it, why not?  You know,  there’re no rigid rules about life. In the film industry, such makeovers are completely justifiable because it’s all about the way you look.

You’ve achieved way beyond our expectations. What about yours?
I  never planned anything.  And besides, achievement is a very subjective concept. I’ve done whatever I’ve been compelled to do, and I’ve done it all to the best of my abilities. If I’ve been recognized or honoured for what I’vedone then those are bonuses, not the reason for doing what I did.

But Naseeruddin Shah told me you believe actors work consciously towards getting awards?
Naseer feels actors shouldn’t at all be conscious of the fact they may win an award. But actors, at the end of it all, are actors. How can they be completely impervious of the end-result of  their performances?

Did awards become addictive for you?
 Not at all.  Babu,  the awards happened because those films happened to me at the right time. Those films were served to me on a platter, and  I’m grateful for them. In the last ten years I find myself more and more at the right place at the right time.  The kind of parts that have come my way recently were unimaginable earlier for an actress my age… Did anyone think ten years ago that actresses in our films would get such roles? Ten years ago, it was pack-up time for heroines at  30. All you could do was hold a thali in a white saree. Today, I can play my age.  I abhor the thought of playing a younger woman.  The camera doesn’t lie. And any attempt to not look your age is pathetic on screen. We don’t have proper facilities to look older either.  Thank God, we’replaying our age.  Whether it’s  Amitabh Bachchan or any of us, we are not made to play younger people. Look at poor Nirupa Roy. She got substantial roles. But at the age of 30, they made her put grey in her hair. And Achala Sachdev was all of  16 when she played 60. She quit because she got nightmares about dropping a thali and screaming, ‘Nahin !’. You know an actor or any other human being needs to be comfortable in her space at whatever age she is.

Do you miss not being a mother?
Not really.  There was a point in my life when I  was deeply shocked  I couldn’t be a mother because  I took it for granted that everything normal would happen to me. But that period quickly vanished.  I must thank Honey Akhtar(Javed’s first wife)  for being so gracious and sharing her children with me. Farhan and Zoya  ARE my children. I feel very proud of them. On the other hand, I feel it’s wrong for women in our society to be made to feel incomplete just because they are not mothers. Just like my character in Deepa Mehta’s  Fire. Because I was involved in many other areas of life and productive activities, I  wasn’t judged for not being a mother.  There was no pressure on me for not having children. But I’m sure it’d have been wonderful to have children. And yes, I’ve never had time for any regrets.

No regrets at all?
Only one. Please Subhash, mujhe khana pakana sikha do. If I knew how to cook, hum honge kamyaab.

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